What if You Had to Choose: Lauren or Emily
by AJ's Stories
Summary: Emily is cursed with PTSD, scared Doyle will come back for her. What happens if he comes, and makes her choose between the ruins of Emily's life now, or the unknown world of Lauren Reynolds? Rated M for later chapters.


_Emily laid awake in the bed. She couldn't, no, she wouldn't. She would not call that bed in the Paris hotel her bed. Because it wasn't her bed._

_Her hand slide up her stomach, she felt too weak to lift it. She stopped when she reached the, still tender, clover that Ian had brunt into her chest. She glanced out the window and noticed that the sun was slowly slipping down past the horizon. She rolled to her side to watch it, dosing off sometime while it slipped into the night._

_She bolted up in bed, hearing a noise she reached for a gun that wasn't there. Feeling the smooth table top she remembered that she hadn't had a gun with her. Her eyes scanned around the dark room._

_**noises. heavy breathing. foot shuffling.**_

_Emily's eyes darted around the room, she wished she had worn more than a bra and panties to bed. She started to get out of the bed, but was stopped. Two hands clamped around her throat and she was pushed against the head board._

Emily gasped, sitting up in bed her hands flew to her throat, she scanned the room, but it was too dark to see anything. She calmed herself after realizing that she was in her apartment, not in Paris. No, that was a long time ago. Ian Doyle had gone off-grid after they found Declan. He'd been shot and after being given medical treatment, he disappeared and she was still worried he'd come after her. Even after two, almost three, years; she was still terrified.

She had just calmed down, she held her head in her hands as she tried to avoid tears. She had actually fallen in love with him and for him to now haunt her dreams; in a menacing way, unlike the ones from long ago, n she'd love for those to come back.

Suddenly a hand slid up her bare back and she stiffened, slowing bringing her face from her hands. Slowly she looked up at him.

"Ian..." She breathed.

"Hello love." Ian cupped her cheek and Emily shivered, "No need to be afraid."

"Wh-what are you doing here?" Emily asked, her voice shaking slightly.

"I'm here to give you a choice. Lauren or Emily." Ian said.

Emily was taken off-guard, "What?" she asked, the question had thrown her, shocked her.

"Lauren or Emily." Ian repeated, looking at her.

"If I choose Emily, are you gonna kill me?" Emily asked, raising a brow.

"You honestly think I'd kill you?" Ian asked, frowning at her.

Emily crossed her arms, "You threatened to, you tried to, you stabbed me with a table leg."

"I didn't want to kill you. I honestly didn't." Ian said, "I had been convinced that you were dead, I felt guilt."

"Something you can't be used to." Emily muttered.

"Choose." Ian said, he was trying to keep his temper under control, but it was becoming increasing hard.

Emily slowly looked around the room, it was coming more into focus, especially since the moon light was now shining in. She found herself thinking of what she'd lose if she chose Lauren. What she'd gain. Whether either life was worth giving up. Whether either life was worth keeping. She suddenly started to really want to go back to being Lauren. To feel the warmth of him next to her at night, to feel loved.

Wait, did she _really _want to be Lauren? Or did she just think she did.

"I want to be Emily." Emily said simply, looking at him, expecting the worse.

Ian showed nothing, "Fine." he said simply, turning on his heel.

"Fine? That's it?" Emily frowned, she had expected him to pull a gun on her, strangle her, stab her, anything.

Ian turned back to face her, "What did you expect?"

"I-" Emily honestly didn't know what she expected, she did, but she didn't want to admit it to neither Ian nor herself.

Ian waited for her response. Emily could feel the tension rising and the air in the room seemed to be thinning.

"I want to be Lauren." Emily said, she didn't even feel herself say it. She didn't even know she had said it. It sounded like someone else was talking, like they had stolen her voice.

Ian was the one that was taken off guard this time, "You do?"

Emily nodded, "I want to be Lauren." she repeated, this time she knew it was her saying it. She felt it, she _wanted _it.

Ian walked over to her, standing right next to her. He was over her, since she was still sitting in bed.

Emily looked up at him, wondering what he would do.

Ian kissed her then, long and passionate, to which Emily reciprocated.

When they both needed air, they broke apart, "Get dressed." he breathed.

"Where are we going?" Emily asked, then decided to add to it, "Do I need warm clothes?"

Ian smiled, "Dress in neutral clothing, we'll be in the car for a while."

Emily nodded and got dressed, pulling on a sweater and jeans with her black combat boots.

**to be continued...**


End file.
